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Cactus Vs. Grapefruit

11 Friday Mar 2016

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Now that I have ventured into both spring training realms, I must now decide which of these two sites wins.

Being a Giants fan I’m going to go ahead and admit bias and give the whole thing to the Cactus League.  There, that was easy.  Even so, it was still close.

Let’s look at the Pros and Cons.

Grapefruit Pros:

Many of the parks are more charming and have that ‘old style’ feel.  Florida Auto Exchange  in Dunedin, in particular, let’s you live with the players in the dugout. The Astros let you actually throw in the bullpen and will put you in for the last inning, but only if you are left handed and don’t mind wearing jersey #123.

Seafood.

Ocean.

BBQ.

You are close to Tarpon Springs where the Greek eats are unsurpassable.

It’s closer to Knoxville .*

Camp Childers goes there. 

Incredible disc golf courses abound.

Dali Museum in St. Pete.

The Phillie Phanatic can only be found in the Grapefruit League.  All other mascots are posers.

Grapefruit Cons:

The drives are long.  If you want to see the Mets one day and then the Blue Jays the next, you are in for a four hour drive. That’s a lot of Radiolab podcasts.

Orlando. I just don’t like this place. It’s wrong.  The fact that Braves play inside of Disneyworld is beyond comprehension. I like the Braves and their fans but I can’t stomach parking next to 12 tour busses of people about to buy things they probably don’t need.

If it’s above 90 degrees, your winterized body will suffer.

Orlando.  It bears repeating.

There are lots of Yankees fans everywhere. I have noticed them particularly in abundance at Yankees games. But they also take over the Blue Jays stadium, too.

Cactus Pros:

No humidity. (Extra points for this.)

Easy drives between stadiums.

Huevos Rancheros.

The Giants stadium is a perfect mix of old and new.  Not too fancy, not too shabby.

Lots of great AirBnB options.

Desert Botanical Gardens.

You might meet Bill Buckner.

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Cactus Cons:

Some spring training stadiums (I’m looking at you Rockies/Dbacks/Cubs) are nicer than some regular stadiums. This feels wrong, like Orlando feels wrong.

If games sell out, it’s way expensive to get tickets.

You have to admit how congenial Dodgers fans are. Until they start losing. Or winning.

It’s very far from Knoxville.*

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So there you have it.  Cactus League takes the win. But Nate Silver knew that before I even conceived of this detailed analysis.

*If you are not from Knoxville, please ignore this statement or move to Knoxville.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Double Headed Monster

16 Monday Mar 2015

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So….when a 76-year-old man suggested hitting two spring training games in two different cities on one day, you will feel like a wimp if you don’t do it.  And so we did.

The first stop:  Joker Marchant stadium in Lakeland.  Where?

Near Orlando.  Lots of stuff is near Orlando.  Even Orlando is near Orlando.

My buddy Camp zoomed us in via his I-phone app that outsmarted the traffic jam. Yes, sometimes technology makes life easier as opposed to just vaguely feeling like really weak heroin.

The first stop after a long drive in Florida traffic is….well you know what that is.  The second stop is the obligatory visit to the gift shop.  Matt, I hope you like your new fetching and festive Tigers pencil.

We found our primo seats (they are all primo at Joker Marchant) and were soon surrounded by some very happy Tiger fans.  Well, until their beer got low- which was about the same time as Nathan came in to pitch and gave up six runs. At that time, they turned in to world class hecklers. I felt sorry for Nathan but who wants to follow Verlander?  Nobody wants to follow Verlander except for his brother, the hitter who snagged two hits and an RBI.  The fans were happy again. They got happy fast.

I know I say this about baseball fans everywhere, but the Tiger fans truly are that perfect blend of gregarious and respectful.  Engaged and observant. Tipsy but not wasted. Enthusiastic but polite.  Unless you are Nathan blowing another inning. In which case, they turn into their team name.

It was a great game even though the Phillies pulled off the win. Who cares? We are at baseball in March. Everybody else is at work. To not enjoy yourself is a crime. Far be it from our trio to break the baseball law.

We grabbed our sunscreen and Tigers pencil and headed out back towards Tampa for a night game:  Braves vs. the Yankees. I see a future where global warming creates more night games in March. It’s the only plus I can think of for global warming. Camp scored outstanding tickets down the first base line, which put us in a great location to watch Tanaka pitch, A-Rod sign autographs, and to witness the battle of the creative cotton candy vendors. Would you have thought to use a train whistle to help sell cotton candy?

Waiting on the game to start and the sun to set.

Waiting on the game to start and the sun to set.

I picked up a program, the slickest and thickest of the Spring Training programs, chocked full of information about the PAST.  There were more pictures of the retired Jeter than of any current player.  In fact, it was basically a Jeter magazine with a scorecard in it. But the fans love Jeter, even if he isn’t there- as witnessed by the plethora of #2 jerseys.

I love the Yankees fans by and large, I really do. But they definitely can lay claim to having the most obnoxious team supporters. Say, the guy next to me. Let’s call him the Bombed Bronxer.

The Bombed Bronxer, like any wasted human, was keen on narrating each and every play with his own special, slurry style. The Braves were all ‘beeches’ and the Yanks were…all ‘beeches’ as well. He gave a running monologue, to no one in particular, about his girlfriend’s breasts, about how he shouldn’t have ‘taken so much’ of that stuff, about fairly accurate predictions of which of their body parts would hit us as they squeezed down the aisle, about how his girlfriend should go get him more beer because he was too drunk to get it himself, and so forth.  Note: he didn’t use lackluster terms like breasts and body parts.

This was a particularly exciting game because it marked the return of the injured and honorable Yankees ace, Tanaka. It also was a showcase for the reputation injured A-Rod who was MORE than eager to sign whatever needed signing. Camp waltzed down and snapped this:

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And yet, despite his good will tour down the first base line, he got booed at the plate, but not by the Bombed Bronxer. I think the Bronxer had a crush on him.

To sum up the game:  Tanaka pitched beautifully for two innings, taking the Braves down one by one. I am a Braves fan but I am also a fan of great pitching and this guy just really has it down. I would happily take a free ticket to see him pitch anytime, anywhere. It was a perfect cool night with lots of great plays, solid action, and good seats to watch it all from, with additional free add-on entertainment all around us.  Until he passed out.

God Bless America, back to the bench? (The Pretzel Conspiracy)

24 Monday Mar 2014

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The New York Yankees can and should keep God Bless America in their rotation.  There is a history there, a profound one at that. That’s plenty of of chances to catch a plethora of performances of said song for one year.  Agree? Kate Smith, we love ya, but the saturation point has arrived. About six years ago.

I don’t know how to start a movement on this topic without being accused of being an un-patriotic heathen. But it’s not about that- it’s just not that good of a song. Not one I want to hear EVERY SINGLE GAME.  Plus, there is already a perfect song for the 7th inning stretch. More worrisome,  I got a cold glare at Jet Blue for not taking my hat off for that particular number.  Dear Lee Greenwood fan:  according to my records, this is a (historical/tired) pop song and not an anthem. If we start this kind of trend, where will it end? With everyone removing their sandals for Sweet Caroline?

I’ve noticed a lot of parks are quietly dropping this gem from the lineup.  I submit to you that this is clear, cultural progress. And, if they don’t drop it, fine.  That’s just one more Bavarian pretzel opportunity for me.

Hmmm….maybe that’s why they play it in first place.  Anyone got a copy of the the 2014 Pretzel Sales Prospectus? I got theory going on, here.

 

 

Brian McCann in pinstripes

17 Monday Mar 2014

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This time… it’s personal.

McCann was my dad’s favorite player.  When we used to watch the Braves in his later years, he would he sit up a bit more straight, focus in tighter, when McCann was at the plate.  I really wish he would have lived long enough to see McCann take on Carlos Gomez, and win, in the infamous third baseline stare down.  And if I am being greedy, I wish he were here right now to go to breakfast with me and represent the best of humanity at the buffet as I represented the guy sitting next to such a person.

There’s really nothing positive about him being gone, but at least he didn’t have to see McCann in Yankee pinstripe.  He wouldn’t have heckled, he wouldn’t have belittled him, but I know he would have trouble with it.  I have trouble with it. If he had to leave at all I was hoping he would go the American League, but not THAT part of the American League.

Yesterday was my first opportunity to see him play, albeit in a spring training game vs. the Braves, his old flame. The first time he came to the plate, I just stared with no single emotion taking over from the countless others.  While I was processing that, a Braves fan yelled “TRAITOR” a particularly quiet moment. A mixture of uneasy laughs and easy laughs followed.

But…he looked…so… earnest.  Like he always has.  It was still the same guy my dad loved watching catch and hit baseballs. More importantly, he seemed pretty friendly with his old teammates, who, unlike the betrayed heckler, seemed pleased to see him, whatever his fashion choices.

The second time at bat, the heckler used the same “TRAITOR” joke- this time with less appreciation from the Braves fans. It’s like when the nerd gets teased in junior high- you go along with it by laughter, just to avoid getting the same abuse yourself.  But after awhile, you take up for the nerd or at least stop piling on.

Not that McCann is nerd.  In fact, he can be a hothead ready to defend the honor for a slighted pitcher. If I can only stick one label on him, it’s not hothead.  It’s ball player. The guy is a great ball player.  And, BAM, there goes a wobbly drive to right field that results in a double.  Not pretty, but it’s true in it’s direction.

When I was leaving the game I walked out the backside of Steinbrenner Field and saw a guy running laps around practice park.  It was McCann.  I stopped, admired, and forgave- and even forgave the folks who let him get away.

On the long, hot walk back to the hotel I also silently forgave one Mark Teixeira, who was my mom’s favorite.  She never saw him switch to the dark side, either. Like dad, she was also painfully absent at breakfast.