So….when a 76-year-old man suggested hitting two spring training games in two different cities on one day, you will feel like a wimp if you don’t do it.  And so we did.

The first stop:  Joker Marchant stadium in Lakeland.  Where?

Near Orlando.  Lots of stuff is near Orlando.  Even Orlando is near Orlando.

My buddy Camp zoomed us in via his I-phone app that outsmarted the traffic jam. Yes, sometimes technology makes life easier as opposed to just vaguely feeling like really weak heroin.

The first stop after a long drive in Florida traffic is….well you know what that is.  The second stop is the obligatory visit to the gift shop.  Matt, I hope you like your new fetching and festive Tigers pencil.

We found our primo seats (they are all primo at Joker Marchant) and were soon surrounded by some very happy Tiger fans.  Well, until their beer got low- which was about the same time as Nathan came in to pitch and gave up six runs. At that time, they turned in to world class hecklers. I felt sorry for Nathan but who wants to follow Verlander?  Nobody wants to follow Verlander except for his brother, the hitter who snagged two hits and an RBI.  The fans were happy again. They got happy fast.

I know I say this about baseball fans everywhere, but the Tiger fans truly are that perfect blend of gregarious and respectful.  Engaged and observant. Tipsy but not wasted. Enthusiastic but polite.  Unless you are Nathan blowing another inning. In which case, they turn into their team name.

It was a great game even though the Phillies pulled off the win. Who cares? We are at baseball in March. Everybody else is at work. To not enjoy yourself is a crime. Far be it from our trio to break the baseball law.

We grabbed our sunscreen and Tigers pencil and headed out back towards Tampa for a night game:  Braves vs. the Yankees. I see a future where global warming creates more night games in March. It’s the only plus I can think of for global warming. Camp scored outstanding tickets down the first base line, which put us in a great location to watch Tanaka pitch, A-Rod sign autographs, and to witness the battle of the creative cotton candy vendors. Would you have thought to use a train whistle to help sell cotton candy?

Waiting on the game to start and the sun to set.

I picked up a program, the slickest and thickest of the Spring Training programs, chocked full of information about the PAST.  There were more pictures of the retired Jeter than of any current player.  In fact, it was basically a Jeter magazine with a scorecard in it. But the fans love Jeter, even if he isn’t there- as witnessed by the plethora of #2 jerseys.

I love the Yankees fans by and large, I really do. But they definitely can lay claim to having the most obnoxious team supporters. Say, the guy next to me. Let’s call him the Bombed Bronxer.

The Bombed Bronxer, like any wasted human, was keen on narrating each and every play with his own special, slurry style. The Braves were all ‘beeches’ and the Yanks were…all ‘beeches’ as well. He gave a running monologue, to no one in particular, about his girlfriend’s breasts, about how he shouldn’t have ‘taken so much’ of that stuff, about fairly accurate predictions of which of their body parts would hit us as they squeezed down the aisle, about how his girlfriend should go get him more beer because he was too drunk to get it himself, and so forth.  Note: he didn’t use lackluster terms like breasts and body parts.

This was a particularly exciting game because it marked the return of the injured and honorable Yankees ace, Tanaka. It also was a showcase for the reputation injured A-Rod who was MORE than eager to sign whatever needed signing. Camp waltzed down and snapped this:

And yet, despite his good will tour down the first base line, he got booed at the plate, but not by the Bombed Bronxer. I think the Bronxer had a crush on him.

To sum up the game:  Tanaka pitched beautifully for two innings, taking the Braves down one by one. I am a Braves fan but I am also a fan of great pitching and this guy just really has it down. I would happily take a free ticket to see him pitch anytime, anywhere. It was a perfect cool night with lots of great plays, solid action, and good seats to watch it all from, with additional free add-on entertainment all around us.  Until he passed out.